What should I look for in a church? (It’s the wrong question)

Someone asks what they should look for in a church, and they’re met with the typical answers: Find a pastor who preaches a particular way. Find a church that inspires you every Sunday. Find a church that’s going to push you to grow or has a place for you to serve. Find a church that really teaches the Bible. Find a church that prioritizes evangelism and missions. Find a church with a strong small-group ministry. And a good student ministry. And a good children’s program. Find a church with lots of diversity. Find a church that isn’t too big. And the list goes on.

The question, however, is inherently flawed. Ask me, “What should I look for in a church?” and I will tell you simply that you’re asking the wrong question. Start asking the right question, which is this: How should the Church look, and how might I help it to look that way?

I’m serious. This isn’t just a question; it’s a revelation. And as long as you resist it, you resist a very important part of God’s will for your life.

To think of “the Church” as something other than your own body, as something which is capable of being what it ought to be without you, is a fundamental error in judgment. The unfortunate reality, however, is that many Christians operate this way, without any real sense of agency when it comes to building the Church, largely because they’re thinking of the Church as an institution instead of people. I hope to help change that.

Honestly, I’m tired of watching my Christian friends move away and be at the mercy of whatever new city they’re in to find a church that will (hopefully) suffice. I’m grieved by the fact that so many of my loved ones have settled with a form of “church” that is nowhere near the goal, and that they don’t seem to have the slightest clue how they might do something about it, let alone that they’re even allowed to.

The fact is, regardless of how your church functions, no one can keep you yourself from doing any of the things I’ve outlined in this book, and that’s where all of us must start—i.e., being faithful to live according to our own convictions.

No one can keep you from radically waiting on the Lord, inviting people into your home, loving them like Christ, speaking into their lives in a way that no one else will, building them up in the Lord, and cultivating the kinds of community we’ve been talking about—one that is full of spiritual gifts and prayer, one that is gospel-centric, one that is practicing submission and church discipline, etc. You don’t need anyone’s permission to begin loving and relating with God’s people in the way that you’re called to love and relate with them. And you can only learn by doing.

So, whatever kind of church you’re currently a part of (or if you’re not part of one at all), you have no excuse not to get started (unless your excuse is that you’re actively seeking the Lord about how or when to get started)!

If I could summarize my desire for the Church in practical terms, it would be that every Christian becomes capable of building up the Body of Christ wherever they are. It’s that fewer and fewer Christians would be dependent on others to build for them a healthy, fulfilling, transformative, Spirit-filled Christian community, but that each person would become the steady, life-giving communal Rock that others gather ’round for fresh water. There is something very empowering about knowing that, wherever you are, you can build the kind of church that your soul longs for—of course, only by the power of God—and that it doesn’t depend on any formal institution (which, at times, is more a hindrance than anything) but on human relationships and the Holy Spirit.

This is, ultimately, what I want for you—the school teacher, the architect, the carpenter, the salesman, the counselor, the stay-at-home mother, the doctor, the business owner, the retiree, the recent college grad, the missionary, the church-planter, or the pastor.

That you become an unstoppable force of Kingdom advancement, not by running yourself dry in vain striving, but by trusting the Lord and being empowered by him.

That you become one who is capable of shaping the trajectory of the souls around you, of leading them into the abundant life that Jesus promised.

That you would never be a victim of what the Church lacks, but that the Church would become a product of your life, your love, your faith.

That you would have a framework for serving Christ and serving people that helps you to bear more fruit and to remain more at rest than you’ve ever dreamed was possible.

Above all things, as you set out on this course, I pray you make up your mind that God is faithful. Fix your eyes on the Chief Shepherd and Overseer of your souls. Lean on him for all wisdom and strength as you build, and do not give up! The fruit you desire and the community you were made for are on the other side of you putting on Christ and daring to believe what others won’t—that God will build it if we let him!